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Q:

My 4 year baby has become very stubborn and she always wants candies and chocolates and she cries a lot everytime I don't give her. It happens more than 10 times a day.
What should I do?



asha chaudhry

hi hussain. pls don't keep them at home for a while. or keep just one a day as her daily quota. pls show her a video on how cavities attack teeth. if need be take her to a dentist! we all give our kids sweets - usually as a reward. also pls try to source dark jaggery - which is much better than sugar. if u can pls make a healthy sweet snack like kheer, sweet jaggery roti or sooji ka halwa which may help with her sweet cravings. good luck - pls don't be disheartened. we all have gone thru toddler addictions :)

asha chaudhry

Preetjyot Kaur(mylittlemuffin) Prisha Lalwani pls share ur advice!

asha chaudhry

Gayatri Rao - pls help!

Gayatri Rao

Hi Hussain. It is very important that you do not relent to every wish of hers. While treats like chocolates are very convenient to keep children calm, you should also remember that it does more harm than good to her teeth. If she cries then let her cry for sometime, believe me she will stop after a while. Use treats only as a reward. In this way you also teach her important lessons in disciple. While you are at this, don't be angry just stay calm.  

BabyChakra

Sheena Kalia do give u r expert advise

Sonika Singh

hello... Hussain..same thing my daughter was doing ...she cry in shop ..I want chocolate.....I leave her there I said no..I do not have money...I can not buy .. .she came along with me but crying​. on way...when I came home I said everybody saw you crying​..now they will laugh on you ...have you saw any one crying.....let her cry never give...say  only once in  week I will give you ...wait for Sunday....if you will cry ..then I will not give you on Sunday also...tell her stories..baby who do not listen parents god punished them

Sheena Kalia

Dear Hussain, Temper tantrums need to be handled tactfully. They are a normal part of growing up. An emotional outburst or meltdown in that age group is very common. It takes time but consistency helps.You need to check on these contributing factors 1) Stress - Reduce the amount of stress in the environment ,check on Hunger levels, overstimulation and tiredness. 2)Check on how your child is feeling. If you see a tantrum is building try and distract your child with another activity. 3)Check on your own feelings too. I can understand how tough it is to stay calm while a child is throwing a tantrum but pretend if u have to but stay calm. Your child can sense your anxiety 4)Check on Tantrum triggers and try and identify these triggers if need be keep a notebook and note it down. What happens just before and after a tantrum. This will help you identify the trigger. 5)As tough as it is you need to wait out a tantrum or else your child learns how and when to involve you and get your attention. 6)Do not give your child that specific thing they want so strictly No pay offs. This way you are not giving in to their demands. 7)Give Praise and encouragement when appropriate. Acknowledge how well they handled their frustration. 8)Offer choices where possible and give logical consequences. 9)Reward your child for good behaviour 10)Please don't judge your parenting skills over a tantrum.Rather focus on how to stay focussed and respond appropriately.

Sheena Kalia

Dear Hussain, Temper tantrums need to be handled tactfully. They are a normal part of growing up. An emotional outburst or meltdown in that age group is very common. It takes time but consistency helps.You need to check on these contributing factors 1) Stress - Reduce the amount of stress in the environment ,check on Hunger levels, overstimulation and tiredness. 2)Check on how your child is feeling. If you see a tantrum is building try and distract your child with another activity. 3)Check on your own feelings too. I can understand how tough it is to stay calm while a child is throwing a tantrum but pretend if u have to but stay calm. Your child can sense your anxiety 4)Check on Tantrum triggers and try and identify these triggers if need be keep a notebook and note it down. What happens just before and after a tantrum. This will help you identify the trigger. 5)As tough as it is you need to wait out a tantrum or else your child learns how and when to involve you and get your attention. 6)Do not give your child that specific thing they want so strictly No pay offs. This way you are not giving in to their demands. 7)Give Praise and encouragement when appropriate. Acknowledge how well they handled their frustration. 8)Offer choices where possible and give logical consequences. 9)Reward your child for good behaviour 10)Please don't judge your parenting skills over a tantrum.Rather focus on how to stay focussed and respond appropriately.

Preetjyot Kaur(mylittlemuffin)

Hi Hussain... This is something that all toddler moms face at some time or the other...
The key to this is to never give up to them when they cry.. Coz that gives a message to d kids that they can get their way out when they cry...
OK now this might be really tough at a mother, but remember never ever to give in in such a case...
A few things that you can do:
Let the child know that mumma won't listen of you cry..
Try to divert her mind..
If that's not possible,  just move out of the room,  and tell her that you are ready to discuss when she would stop crying.
This can be maddening coz I remember once my girl ended up crying for over half an hour... But I didn't give up...
It can take u days to sort this... But don't loose hope... IGNORE ur girl and grab a book or do something that should make her realise that crying isn't helping her...
Gradually u can begin rewarding her... D day u realise she hasn't cried at all for goodies,  u may give her one on ur own... This would make her realise that it's not actually crying,  but being happy that gets u rewards... But then again be careful and don't form this a habit...
Hope this helps u...
We all have been there done that... Hugs to u momma...
asha Chaudhry thanks for the tag😀

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