24 May 2022 | 4 min Read
Author | 2578 Articles
The truth about parenthood is that your life will never be the same again. Don’t take it the wrong way; parenthood has its own set of perks – little joys and moments of bliss that you wouldn’t give up for the world. But here’s the thing, your non-parent friends don’t just seem to understand, that your concept of “fun” has now changed completely. You’ve bid adieu to the long nights of carousing and drinking and the hungover mornings. After all, it isn’t just yourself you have to think about now; you have a tiny human being to take care of – an angel of a child who is entirely dependent on you for her/his well-being.
The Bitter-sweet Emotions
That counts for something, right? But your single friends don’t seem to make things easier. Asking you to come over for the night or sudden extravagant plans just won’t do anymore. This is all the more annoying if you are the first in your group of friends to have a kid. Of course, you don’t want to give up on your gang – they’ve seen you through your best and your worst and have stuck by you through thick and thin. But it certainly would be nice, if they could be a tad bit more considerate and sensitive to your problems.
Listed below, are a few things you wish your non-parent friends understood about your life:
1. Kids are messy. Plain and simple. It has nothing to do with you. With a toddler running around the house, there are better things to take care of. Your friends need to understand that.
2. Coming over and cringing at the mess doesn’t make it any easier. You know how messy it is, you don’t need to be reminded over and over again.
3. Don’t make sudden plans and inform at the last minute. It doesn’t matter if you were up for it when you were younger; as a parent, you can’t just afford to leave the house on sudden notice.
4. It isn’t that easy to get a sitter. There are a lot to be taken into account while hiring a sitter. You need to ensure that they’re the right person for your kid. Blaming you for being picky will not help.
5. There are so many things to take care of, things to prepare and people to inform. Sudden outings or trips are a thing of the past. To go out, you need to plan at least a week in advance.
6. Not understanding your fatigue and exhaustion is one thing; but trying to justify it by stating that they too had a hectic day might just make you lose your temper. As a parent, it isn’t just physical exhaustion that takes a toll on you. Your brain is tired too, and would love a break.
7. You haven’t had a good night’s sleep in ages. You don’t remember the last time you actually enjoyed a cup of coffee all by yourself or with your partner. When was the last time you had a moment’s peace? No one’s complaining, but parenthood is a full time job and unless you step into it, you never really know what “tired” means. It would be great if your friends could understand that.
8. Of course, you don’t meet your best friends as much as you used to. But if they really are your friends, they would empathize and make an effort to come by more.
9. It’s important for your non-parent friends to understand that your baby has a routine, and there’s nothing you can do about it.
10. Also, last but not the least, it would be great if your non-parent friends stopped complaining. They need to understand that you have embarked on a new journey, a journey that you are looking forward to.
If you have been blessed with a bunch of compassionate and understanding friends, you’re one of the lucky ones. If not, it would be time to set your priorities right.