I have never understood the basis on which people say what gender the child is going to be to a pregnant women in India( I have mentioned India specifically because abroad the gender is disclosed but in India it is not due to obvious reasons).
The moment the news of a pregnancy is out, there starts the stories of the gender of the child as well. I mean how is it possible to tell the gender by the way the mom looks, or eats, or behaves.
I guess, here it's a common notion to keep cooking stories relating to the gender of the child. But don't you think it directly or indirectly creates an opinion in the mother's mind as well as she constantly hears them so willingly or unwillingly it registers in her head. This is exactly what happened with me.
The stories of the gender of my child started coming around the time when my bump started showing. Both me and my husband were never bothered about the gender of the child as that was not a concern to us.
Had it being my second pregnancy, maybe I would have some thoughts on the gender.
Don't get me wrong here, What I mean is - If I have a girl as my first child I would think that God, let my second child be a boy or vice versa for the simple reason that I would have the best of both worlds----A GIRL AND A BOY....FAMILY COMPLETE
But in your first pregnancy, these thoughts generally don't come to you as you are too excited and there is a lot of adrenaline rush and you are just thrilled to welcome the bundle of joy and take it in your arms.
Well, well, well.....Things don't happen how we want it to happen. When the opinions started coming from all corners I realized I started to form an opinion too.
In my case, majority of the people would say that I will have a boy. During my 6/7th month I happened to attend my brother's wedding and TA DA....Wedding means lots and lots of people which means lots and lots of opinions....Even here, I was bombarded with opinions regarding my baby's gender....Majority(actually everyone) would say that I will have a boy.
Since, everyone started saying the same thing it subconsciously got registered in my head as well and I was pretty sure that it will be a BOY....
The day of my delivery also came and I was pretty confident that I already know it's a BOY. My world stopped for a moment( trust me I am not exaggerating here) when the doctor informed me ITS A GIRL. I couldn't believe my ears but couldn't react as well due to post normal delivery symptoms.
The 2-3 days at the hospital were normal where I was nursing her but still I wasn't able to accept the fact that I delivered a baby girl.
My mother's guilt started pouring from all corners of the world and I was constantly telling myself that HOW CAN I EVEN THINK LIKE THIS, SHE IS MY BABY AND I NEED TO ACCEPT AND ACKNOWLEDGE THIS FACT AND LOVE HER WITH ALL MY HEART. I felt I had become hard as a stone to even think like this.
It was only after I came home and got some alone time with her, I suddenly started crying seeing the baby asleep.
My guilt or wrong thoughts vanished in a second when I just cried my heart out seeing her sleep so peacefully. That was the moment when MAGIC happened and an everlasting BOND between a mother and her baby was sealed. This was the time when I first felt the real joy of being a mother.
From that day until today, I am ever grateful to God for giving me such a beautiful bundle of joy. No regrets, no negative thoughts but just pure love and affection is what have blossomed my relationship with my girl.
Yes, I still regret the very fact that I had formed opinions and was not able to accept the truth then because being brought up in a broad minded society that was not something I was expecting from myself.
Don't you think its baseless to form opinions about the gender of a child as it directly or indirectly registers in the parent's mind?? Do, let me know your views on the same.
It's me signing off now.
This article is an entry for BLOG-A-THON.
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#havingababy #pregnancymyths #genderstereotypes #blogathon