How To Heal From A Traumatic Birth

Giving birth to a new life is one of the most awaited times for many new mothers. After all, the precious little one is their bundle of joy and love. However, the experience of giving birth is different for every mum. There are some hiccups in the way at times. In this article, we’re going to find out what a traumatic birth is and how to cope with it.

What Is A Traumatic Birth Experience? 

When a new mum experiences distress or discomfort during the process of childbirth, it is referred to as a traumatic birth experience. The experience of the trauma is different for every woman as every woman is unique. 

A traumatic birth experience doesn’t necessarily mean a physical complication at the time of birthing such as a c-section or perineal tears. It could also be because of the psychological trauma that goes behind the process. For instance, the stress of giving birth in a hospital during COVID. Some women may have had a normal birth but might have felt they weren’t listened to.

Birthing experience can be very stressful and physically tiring even when things go as per plan. No matter what, it’s best to find ways to heal and move on.

5 Ways To Recover From A Traumatic Birth

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings Towards Your Baby

You may find it difficult to care for your baby as he or she has played a role in instigating the trauma. You may feel detached from the baby in such a situation and even have negative feelings towards your baby. But try to view these feelings within the context of what happened and take the pressure off yourself. Give yourself time and take one step each day.

2. Don’t Compare Yourself to Others

Other people’s birth stories may make you feel upset or annoyed by other people’s birth especially if they had a better experience. It is common to have these feelings so don’t be too hard on yourself. 

Every mum is unique and while it can be very hard, try not to compare your experience to other people’s. This will only make you end up feeling unhappy and distressed. Instead, focus on how you feel about yourself, and what you want to do and find a positive way to move forward. 

3. Spend Time with Your New Child

If you feel disconnected from your baby after a traumatic birth, you are not alone. While those feelings cannot be easy to prevent, you can try to address the issue by spending more time with your newborn. Focus on easy skin-to-skin contact with your little one and breastfeeding as per your comfort to get through this difficult time. 

4. Do Not Judge Yourself

While plans for how the birth should have been might not have worked out, it isn’t a reflection of who you are as a person or as a parent. You must feel proud of yourself for getting through the experience. It is completely fine to experience sadness after such an event. Hence, accept and acknowledge that you are in need of support at this time and take necessary action.

5. Talk to People You Trust

How other people react to your experience may not be helpful. Since childbirth is common it is often seen as ‘normal’ by others. Hence,  it might be difficult for others to find it emotionally difficult or traumatic. 

If someone you talk to doesn’t understand how you feel, they may end up saying the wrong thing which can make you feel even worse. You might not consider your partner’s feelings valid because he’s not the one who gave birth. 

Hence, all of this can be difficult to cope with. So try to focus on the people who understand your experience and can offer the support you need. This may be your friend, partner or family member.

Healing from a traumatic birth experience will take time. However, it is important to share and seek support from others who can help as you are not alone.