CONFESSION OF A NEW MOM:
I wanted to make this post as Anonymous.. as Baby Chakra moms always looked up at me, After all me the Bold Becca but I decided against it, because I want to be genuine here. I'm sure most of you all have gone through what I'm going through.
Is giving birth a joyful experience?
NO
Was I ready though I was given 2 weeks time to get prepared for my C Section?
NO
How did I enter the Operation theater?
CRYING
Did I act brave inside the theatre or even tried not to panic?
NO
Did I fell in love with my daughter the moment I saw her? (I should because this is what I wanted for past few years)
NO
Did I feel out of the world and got emotional when she latched so good on my breast ? ( Many latching photos with mom's emotional tears came into my mind)
NO , I screamed out of pain and I wanted her to take off her mouth.
I broke down and cried when the doctor said she is 2.7 kg, Female. The gender did not register in my mind at all as I was shocked to know she is just 2.7 Kg and felt as a mother I failed big time.. I cried whenever she cried at the hospital and the nurses would barge in and pass comments like " Why you made her cry?" " She is so small but see how she cries" " Your daughter cries a lot huh" so on and so forth.
The cleanliness freak me was not able to keep myself clean so forget the baby now. I cursed whoever said C Section is simple , I cursed people who said normal delivery mothers are brave and c section moms are not..
I'm not here to discourage anyone please understand that, I'm here to let you all know every women differs and your personality doesn't help when it comes to giving birth.. It's okay to break down .. it's okay to be coward. I'm still learning, I'm still getting used to my daughter, I'm still trying not to sulk when she cries for my Milk..We both have longgggg way to go!
If this post made any of the perfect moms offended I'm sorry again..
I wanted to make this post as Anonymous.. as Baby Chakra moms always looked up at me, After all me the Bold Becca but I decided against it, because I want to be genuine here. I'm sure most of you all have gone through what I'm going through.
Is giving birth a joyful experience?
NO
Was I ready though I was given 2 weeks time to get prepared for my C Section?
NO
How did I enter the Operation theater?
CRYING
Did I act brave inside the theatre or even tried not to panic?
NO
Did I fell in love with my daughter the moment I saw her? (I should because this is what I wanted for past few years)
NO
Did I feel out of the world and got emotional when she latched so good on my breast ? ( Many latching photos with mom's emotional tears came into my mind)
NO , I screamed out of pain and I wanted her to take off her mouth.
I broke down and cried when the doctor said she is 2.7 kg, Female. The gender did not register in my mind at all as I was shocked to know she is just 2.7 Kg and felt as a mother I failed big time.. I cried whenever she cried at the hospital and the nurses would barge in and pass comments like " Why you made her cry?" " She is so small but see how she cries" " Your daughter cries a lot huh" so on and so forth.
The cleanliness freak me was not able to keep myself clean so forget the baby now. I cursed whoever said C Section is simple , I cursed people who said normal delivery mothers are brave and c section moms are not..
I'm not here to discourage anyone please understand that, I'm here to let you all know every women differs and your personality doesn't help when it comes to giving birth.. It's okay to break down .. it's okay to be coward. I'm still learning, I'm still getting used to my daughter, I'm still trying not to sulk when she cries for my Milk..We both have longgggg way to go!
If this post made any of the perfect moms offended I'm sorry again..
Hugs to you!
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This is me and every other mom who goes through c section.the world never understands..
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Rebecca we all can relate to it. I too had c section with just 2 kgs tiny baby. And everything will settle soon. Just take rest whenever you can. And eat well. All the very best <u>de</u>ar.
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That's so sweet of you to advice me about the dos and donts dear..I will do as you suggested..sweets and cold stuffs I am not even touching in pregnancy already..but will be more cautious now on..God bless you..take care of yourself and ur <u>lo</u> 😗
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Monisha Thampi
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20 Apr 2018