I forgot what it was like to feel so intensely.
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To be so overcome w sobs that you struggle to breathe - gasping for air as your tiny chest heaves up and down against mine.
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To feel so out of control that your thoughts race faster than the words can come.
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I’m grown now, but I still know what this rollercoaster feels like to ride. The only difference is that I learned to pull the brake many years ago. I don’t necessarily think that’s good, how easily I’ve learned to use it, but it is what it is.
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Amidst so many reasons I can no longer count, this one is one of the biggest blessings of being your mother. You’ve reminded me what it is to feel. Unabashedly. As it comes. Not just the highs, but the lows - the ones that were first to go as I learned what was ok and what wasn’t.
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Suddenly, I remember every feeling that was too strong, every reaction that was too big, and how over time they turned inwards until it became hard to feel anything at all.
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All of that to say - really when I hug you, I guess I’m hugging me too.

photo & words by @erinsinsidejob
#momslove #familyandrelationships