Q:

Its bad enough to have a mother-in-law who keeps finding fault with everything, and you would think coming home would provide some peace of mind... But mother is also making it unbearable blaming that I am not doing a good job because I am not giving cerelac, biscuits, sugar or salt to the baby. Where do I go? Feeling so depressed. Trying to ignore, but it does start affecting at some point



Sangeetha Karuna

Hey Anonymous, relax dear. It happens for every one. Once we become pregnant, everybody loves to give advices and they want us to follow without telling a word. We are in a generation where we will not agree without anyone proving their piece of advise is valid. So its a ugly fact that fight will happen between generations. Also, in those days  outside food was less contaminated. But now even in rice they are preparing with plastic. Horrible😑. Follow what your heart says. Try to explain them, if they are not listening its their fault. Relax and enjoy your motherhood 😊

BabyChakra

Bear hugs to you dear !!! Just relax and let it not affect u. Here is what our expert Sheena Kalia has to advise.
Dear Mom,
It can be heartbreaking when no one seems to be understanding enough and constant blaming and fault finding can have a negative impact. The key point being do u believe you are not doing a good job? Just because someone says it does not make it true.I understand environment is a contributing factor to the way you feel but primarily it's your thoughts about the situation that make or break you. The situation may seem helpless but can you involve your husband in this and share your concerns as he may be in a better position to help intervene. If depression has set in, it would be helpful for you to seek counselling as essentially your coping strategies need to be worked upon so you start using healthier ways to handle such situations. Before it seeps in further do share it with your husband and also address it with your mom. You need to assert your needs too and that begins by starting to take care of yourself first through self love.

asha chaudhry

hey girl, first a huge babychakramomgrouphug from all of us. phew! sometimes the older generation just doesnt get it. wish i cud come to ur house with my childoo and show folks that i never gave her ceralac, or biscuits or sugar/salt till 1yr old! do u have any good friends near moms place? catch up wth them! watch a movie on tv or pls listen to music. call ur best friend - anyone u like to cheer u up! pls dont let it affect u! just keep busy wth baby and chill :) and pls feel free to share anything here. we are all here for u. tc :) Sheeba Vijesh Sheeba Rizvi aditi manja Gayatri Rao Charu Sareen Gujjal sonam patel Nisha Dayal Archana Bhosale #tagfwd

Sheeba Rizvi

Hey Beautiful courageous mom...first all accept my big hug dear and chill. I know it's a difficult task to bear such unpleasant things after putting all your efforts. You have to avoid such negativity divert your mind do something of your choice listen to music play with your baby no remedy better than your baby's smile.Go for outing with your best buddy be with us as well we all are here to entertain motherhood as well. I too faced the same phase as you do a deal tried all these but since babychakra came into my life my all negativity gone as it  never existed. ☺smile and be positive as it surely affect to the kid.....thanks asha chaudhry for the tag😊

Gayatri Rao

We all have well-meaning elders among us who tell us what to do. Learn to sift good advises from the bad. The fact that you recognised that biscuits and sugar is bad for your baby is fact enough you are capable of better judgement. Smile at whatever they say but do what you think best. After all they tended to their babies almost 2 decades before, so calmly explain that a lot has changed from then!

Nisha Dayal

A big hug to you.  Just chill kuch tho log kahengay unka kaam hai kehena. I never gave biscuits, cerelac and salt to my girl.  Till date I hardly give her biscuits I find them unhealthy.  My kid always had sabji, dal and roti. You just relax.  Read some books, listen to music.  Take a  holiday see a new place.

Prisha Lalwani (Mummasaurus)

where do you go?? You come to babychakra!! mother in laws can get really ppressing with their 'advices' but what you are doing is absolutely right! stick to it, she will talk and let her talk. when she is in good mood, open uo informative articles and shre the details wit her. take her to the doctor with you and talk bout feeding these items. things will get better , shre with us whenever you feel like, we are here to help you.

Shyama Santhosh

best way what i feel is to take ur mother in law when u visit paediatrician next time and discuss the same with doctor in fornt of her, i hope a sensible person will understand that way

Saima Tariq

I have a fully diff.  opinion..
it is  a great feeling for a mother who brought his /her baby without giving processed foods , biscuits,  gripe water etc. .
which medical science prohibited fr an infant..
It is my Personal Experience that there is no great harm in giving Cerelac biscuits a bit sugar or salt..
or gripe water..
No one can guarantee that the babies who hv not given those feeds vl be healthier and Intelligent than the babies given such feeds..
Gareeb gharun aur iletrate parents bhi Bacchay paltay hai..
and they brought out in an extra ordinary way ..
hope u got my point..
Not a big issue dear 😊

Saima Tariq

if you find some health issue by giving anything..
that must be stopped..
aur tab aap Apni Maa aur Saasu Maa ko bhi Convince kr sktay ho ..

Sonam patel

we all can understand your situation completely.. just follow what is right for your baby.. as I guess mom and MIL are designed for these things only.. they want us to take care of child like they did those days.. but that's okay.. don't panic.. just relax and enjoy your motherhood.. do what's right for you and your baby and let everyone speak whatever they like.. it's like.. "kuch toh log kahenge.. logo ka kaam h kehna"

Anonymous

thank you for the great advises. not just because of advise, all your love boosted my confidence. thank you so much! love you babychakra and moms

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