Q:

Hi people.. I thought pregnancy is the most beautiful phase of women's life.. Get all the love and concern from family, feeling of all good things. I thought my bad inlaws would change after my news of pregnancy.. But they became worst.. I want to ask, is it possible to stay in one room doing no housework all alone despite of family members under same roof? Nobody comes in room to ask about how u feel.. I did that for 5 years. After begging, keeping head on thr feet my mother in law started giving me fruit in between meals.. And making chapati for lunch dinner.. Rest I cook meal snacks for myself.. Coz my inlaws don't touch the food I make.. Rest all the world love my cooking.. I'm going through severe depression in my pregnancy.. Nobody is there to make me smile, feel like family.. I'm slaved in one room.. When I go out to take even a glass of water.. They stop talking and see my actions lying from thr room. Mother in law is pathetically unhygienic. When I say her to wash hands before making chapati or food..she does that for formality.. The level of unhygien I can't explain. I really don't know how I'm surving, I have no option going anywhere else.. I want love of family who make me feel special.. My innocence has been killed here.. All I think about is depression. I couldn't even feel my baby movements. I'm 19 weeks pregnant.. I do keep posting on this app..i have made some nice friends..i can't write my name coz I'm so much ashamed of my life and destiny



aradhana sharma

Hugs to you anon..ping me personally if you want discuss smthng ...

Neha Mani Mishra

Why don't you talk to your husband about all this? And your parents?

Revauthi Rajamani

Hi
Hey firstly u spoke out to such a beautiful community... Relax u should never feel ashamed of ur identity u r wat u r and u r doing great, u should be brave n positive... Can't u meet ur parents n express how u feel, explain things to your hubby. Dint sit alone read books, listen to music, meditate, create positive thoughts. Please TC dear

Apoorva Bhandari

Hey, if they are like this.. please do not expecr from them. U r responsible for ur own health and ur baby's. Buy fruits n healthy things for urself if they do not provide. Also, till u hv stamina try doing the kitchen work urself atleast it will be hygienic..

Rebecca Prakash

Nah nothing to be ashamed off, Its not your mistake. First please do not expect anything from them..you are enough for you. Stay strong 💪 and stay positive.

Satarupa B Kaur

Ashamed for what?; Every woman has issues sich as this. However, your in laws aren't your life. You and your baby and hubby is. talk out to your hubby and get a maid. see if the fruit and Sabzi wala around can deliver stuff you need at your house.; What about your parents??; Depression can be controlled before it takes control of you.. you have to love and live for the baby now.; Movements you will feel only flutters frsm week20/21 or sometimes even later. Don't stress.; are you having your medicines on time?

Mrs. Chhoker

Why ashamed...? This is not your fault its their fault first of you need to cheer up for you and your baby some ppl are like this. Soon you will feel your baby moments we all are here for you talk to us we are with you always. We are always ready to give you a big BBC group hug like itta................................ Big wala. Or if you want bigger then that we all will join our hands for biggest group hug ever. For you and baby 😘

Mrs. Chhoker

Let me share a secret what you are facing I have faced in my first pregnancy. My mil is bit weard type in my first pregnancy I was on bed rest coz of bleeding my mil live on first floor and I live in second, the only thing she did was serving me food that too when I was dying of hunger. She never asked me how I an feeling, never sit and talk to me. My husband came late night; around 10 so whole day I was alone in my room. But I never get dissapoint, she is what she is why do I care. I eat fruits veggies in between to calm my hunger pangs, read articles related to pregnancy, watch TV, books, bhagwat khata (it helped me lot in that negative environment).yes I do cry at times But I never loose hope. And look I emerged as a strong and better person then last time now I know how to behave with such ppl. If I am not important for you, you are nothing to me.... Bi Bi such ppl. Now I live on my condition. And she has also understood this. So what I belive is "man ke hare har h man k jeete jeet". So try to stay positive in every at least for yourself. Such ppl make is stronger then we are. Do you see any pity on my face. Be strong it's your time to show your real strength.

BEP

Hi. Don't feel depressed, if u feel depressed it will affect ur baby. Don't worry everything will be alright

Richa Chowdhary

Hey anon... don’t be ashamed and done be depressed... first thing baby movements start around 20 weeks or later so don’t worry soon you will start feelin baby... you are not alone and why are you feel so.. you have your baby with you.. you know benefit of being pregnant tat you can talk to your baby and baby will listen to you... now coming to you staying alone in room - read books any kind you like or religious books they will give you strength and help you sail through this.. listen to music, devotional songs, meditate or chant something... you can do something like take up a hobby whatever you like.. you can plan things for your baby... read baby books... just try to enjoy and don’t get bothered by inlaws... if you can keep a help who can cook food for you... keep eating fruits / energy bars or salads or something at regular intervals which is important for you can your baby... once in a while go our for window shopping you will feel good... talk to your hubby and put your heart out...


Last if you want you can ping me on chat.. atleast you can share your thoughts and feel light

Preethi Arvind

Hi anon.. pls don't get depressed.. be happy so that the baby will also be happy.. don't stress ur self.. u pls eat what ever u want to have if ur hungry .. tom ur baby shudn suffer.. listen to music see some comedy show take proper rest eat well.. all this will keep ur mind stress free. Dont bother abt them.. they aren't anything for u.. hope ur husband is supportive atleast.. tc gud care. Loads of love

rekha

I am also facing the same problem even my pregnancy is risky

Anonymous

aradhana sharma
Neha Mani Mishra
Revauthi Rajamani
Apoorva Bhandari
Rebecca Prakash
Satarupa B Kaur
Mrs Chhoker
BP
Richa Chowdhary
Preethi Arvind
rekha
I thank you all for advice.. Yes my husband knows everything.. Unfortunately his parents don't understand his request too for behaving like a family.. I have been surviving here with chanting and reading God's glories only.. We are looking forward to move out, but main point is my pregnancy needs.. Maid is there to cook comes twice a day.. I'm taking care of myself through food and medicine for growth.. But I'm mentally unhappy coz of lack of love and support I had expected from inlaws.. Sometimes love does wonders than medicine too.. I'm connected with u all, which encourages me to breathe here

Satarupa B Kaur

Don't expect love from people who don't care. Be practical. you've got your hubby and will have a baby soon. Nothing else matters.

Mrs. Chhoker

We are here na darling you can pour your heart to us we will listen to you. Coz I know how it feels at least you have this family to support you so cheer up. Things have to change and they will 😃

Richa Chowdhary

Hey dear.. as long your is with you don’t worry.. when ur inlaws don’t listen to their own son so you should not expect anything... you have your baby keep talking to ur baby.. cherish the moment of baby in bump..

Rebecca Prakash

Please post whatever you feel like here.. Anon all of us have family problems and nothing to be ashamed of off. Ask questions here, help other moms, you can comment on lot posts.,there will be games played. With us you will enjoy your days , I was alone with my mom during my previous days as husband was posted abroad BC was my only hope and friend.

Anonymous

Rebecca Prakash
Richa Chowdhary
Mrs Chhoker
Satarupa B Kaur
Yes I shouldn't expect from now at least.. I really want some event should be organized by baby chakra.. So that we all could meet with our sweet babies.. I mean that's the best thing I can imagine.. Some eventful journey with games, knowledge might make us all more closer..

Mrs. Chhoker

Same pinch I also want this but God knows when it will be possible

Richa Chowdhary

Neha Agarwal you need to fulfill this wish of our dear anon friend..

Neha Agarwal

Where are u based dear anon ?

Anonymous

Neha Agarwal.. I'm based in New Delhi.. I would be glad to meet my baby chakra family.. :))

asha chaudhry

Hi anon big hugs. U hv already got loads of amazing advice. Pls dont expect anything from them. If ur hubby is financially sound and willing, can u move out? I know it seems odd but if they arent looking after u right now will they look after u & baby? Its better to have a maid, cook, someone to help u with the baby, and a maalishwali than to suffer in unhygenic conditions with people who are not looking after u. If u are not on bedrest pls make sure u go out every day for a walk and meet a friend who cares about u. U need to do this for urself, for ur sanity, and for ur baby. There are a lit of moms based in delhi/gurgaon/noida here - Ujjwal Mishra(SuperMommy) ritu singhal Nisha Dayal Satyam Sharma Rakhi Puri (beautyofmommying) Nancy Singh . But we all are here for u. We are ur online family. We are here to support u emotionally. So pls be strong. Tc and stay in touch. Ping any of us privately whn u need to. And pls never feel ashamed. This is not ur fault. Lots of love ur way.

Nancy Singh

Heya Anon ,
I am in Noida .. let me know if you need any help or you wanna meet up ..;; dobt worry we all are there for you ..
I have gone through something similar ...;
Situations were worse then this me as my in law wouldnt even give me food .
But look at me Kiwi is already 7 months and is famous on the app..
The lil one will bring so much happiness for u , these trivial things won't; even matter ...
Can't; type much darling my nasty devil is awake ... please inbox me your no. I will call ya ..
Take care; blessings your way

Nisha Dayal

A big hug to you.; Please don't be depressed at all it Will affect your baby.; Read some books,; listen to music, go to park or temple.; Do some yoga or meditation.;; You can pm me anytime you want. Take care & we all are here for you.; We can meet. PM your number

Ritu Singhal

Sweetheart,i can totally understand what you must be going through! Being judged even for a look is what I have faced. Please,never be ashamed of your state because of others actions. My hubby kept all edible stuff in my room and used to check it to refill,he used to do bfast if I was unable to. See,you need at least your hubys support since you have no where to go. Or handle it very tactfully,since it's your pregnancy,its your child,you need to take onus of what emotional food you provide to ur kid! You are NOT ALONE! Your baby is with you now,start talking to your baby. Read to him,sit in a quiet place in your room and close your eyes and imagine your baby. I used to keep on looking at babys pic from my scan,go for nature walk,just ignore what others say! Don't even listen,dont pay attention to their facial expressions,their gestures,just think,they don't exist! I am at Noida dear,lemme know,we can meet up..Ping me in case you need any help! All the Best!👍

Satyam Sharma

Dear! Big Bear hug to you!
You know I have been through something like this.. and hence I decided to move back to my mom's home to give birth to a healthy baby, thankfully my hubby supported me in this decision.
After my delivery since I gave birth to a girl my MIL created lot of ruckus in my life..
But do you think I give a damn to her.. No I don't because of my baby!
If you take stress due to silly people your baby will get affected.. and you know what once the baby is born there will be sooooo much joy in your life.. trust me it will be very beautiful!!
Now I play with my daughter, she laughs giggles it fills me with so much joy... So just wait for that time.; And till then ignore these people, try and see if you can shift out if not then keep yourself busy in some hobby! And keep talking to us.. I am based in Gurgaon let me know if you are nearby we can meet, chit chat, have chai, do bitching about our MILs, you can meet my baby, and promise I will make you laugh!! Stay strong till then 😘

BEP

Hey don't worry everything will be fine. We shouldn't expect love from others, cz it will give lot of pain. So don't worry.. be happy see jokes in ur preferred language so ur mind will be free. See they r doing mistake, we can't change them leave them ND there is no is of changing them but u don't do mistake don't give stress to ur baby be happy everything will be fine..

Anonymous

asha chaudhry
Nancy Singh
Nisha Dayal
ritu singhal
Satyam Sharma
BP
Your support means a lot me to.. Yes we will move out for sure, trying to make the way.. Atleast I would not want them to take away the memories of me and my baby after delivery which is quite possible.. Thr way of living will affect later too.. They will try to give the same ugly habbits to my baby which I won't let happen..they don't even switch on thr room lights for whole day till 7pm.. They eat food in dark, do work in dark.. Whenever I have to talk to them regarding anything I have to bare the darkness..earlier they dint even put on fan or lights in common area near kitchen.. I swear I know what it took for me to get these silly changes.. Anyway I trust God no matter how much I get depressed.. He will soon get me out of this madhouse soon.. Before delivery I will move out..
Also will keep in mind all your contacts.. Will get in touch with you :) thanks a lotttt

asha chaudhry

Stay strong dear. Much love to u...

BEP

Y thanks dear. Be strong like this never give up

Nisha Dayal

Take care and; pm me. I live in South; Delhi

Neha Agarwal

How are you feeling now girl ?

Anonymous

Neha Agarwal.. I'm feeling better.. Changed my routine a bit..

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