Q:

Wanna ask few things, out of which some are bothering me dnt know why. My baby is 21 months now.
1. Around 10 days before she was not well. Got throat infection and high fever. She is okay now. But hving lil throat infection due to some sort of allergy doc says. Since then, she is getting much more aggressive if i say no to something. Always wants to be in my arms (like if i get up from bed also, she wants ki mai use hamesha godi mai uthakar rahun if i m dng any sort of work like a simple drinking water also.) in eve when her dad comes, she hardly goss for 2 to 3 mins to him then again mumma chahiye that too in godi. She was not at all like this before. Due to this its getting too tired for me.
2. She starts crying out loud of her voice agar uski ek choti si baat bhi nhn mano to. Jamin par let jayegi nd jor jor se rona chalu.
3. She is super active from starting nd doesn't want too sit for a single min. Is it ok at this age??
4. She was properly telling me about susu or poti and dng it in her potty seat. But since a month, she knows that usko susu ayi hai. But dint tell me nd used to do anywhere from hiding us and afterwards tell me mumma susu. Then again she started telling me for susu nd when i make her sit in potty seat for that, she just wants to run and dont wanna sit. If force then start throwing tantrums that are not able to handle.
5. Whenever comes to cloth changing. She doesn't wants to do. Cry out loud if we change her clothes. Its either me or her dad. After bathing even its a big milestone for me to make her wear her clothes.
I just dont what has happened to her in this past month. Why she is behaving so. Pls help guys if u can.



Manvi Bhandari

asha chaudhry Priya Sood Aditi Ahuja Dr. Shilpitha Shanthappa Dr. Payal M Yogini Kandre Sonam patel Sheeba Vijesh Roopashree Siddireddy

Neha Mani Mishra

I think this is a growth spurt. Children do behave like this at time when they need attention. At this age they have also started getting aware of their needs. So they try to take charge. Stay calm. Take out some time daily to play with her. When she is with someone else don't be around her. Let her be alone with her dad even if she cries. Let her dad handle her at that time. This way she will understand that she needs to be without mom also at time. Also don't loose your temper. I know it is easier said than done but there is no other way.as you said she still has throat infection may be this is the reason she is too clingy to you.ignore her when she uselessly cries. When she shouts at you don't shout back at her. Speak softly. She will soon understand that this is a better way to talk. Don't just give things to her because she is crying. In this way she will make crying her weapon and you don't want it to happen. Deviate her when she is throwing a tantrum. Engage her in other activities like coloring, painting, sand play etc. Offer her something to eat. Kids can't tell that they are hungry so they cry instead at times. If she behaves nicely reward her.

Roopashree Siddireddy

Hai Dear... I understand your concern. Is this behaviour from recent few days or before that as wel?
1. When kids are ill...we usually pamper a lot and the care n love we show...they want that all time with no condition. In regular time..we try to discipline them. My daughter always does..even now. All the time..i should be there. I know how tiresome it will be. Over time things will settle. We need to keep telling them. Make them understand. You need to say one million times sometimes.
2. She is trying to rule you. Trying nake her things work. She know if she crys...ppl will listen. Always make sure..if something is No. Then its always no, no matter how much she crys. Try to spend more time with her. Playing. Whenever she cry... Say that... You dont understand her words or her actions. Only when she speaks softly, you can help her. Many kids behave like this. No need to worry.
3. Same here. My girl too all the time jumping, standing, running. Fine.
4. This too my daughter use to do. When i asked her lovingly one day...she said.. she hate wet bathroom. So i cleaned in front of her and said...no one use this bathroom. And manjishta will use it. Went for shopping and bought her fav light pink potty seater. After that things are good.
5 many kids play naughtiness in wearing clothes. Use lukewarm water to give bath.
Many these things are normal. But if things are going out of control... please visit doctor once.

Manvi Bhandari

Thank u so much neha. Yes i try to engage her in activities but hardly she plays her own for 5 mins then again godi. I too play with her. Took her outside in eve Daily but yes there are no kids of around her age to play with in our area. She was very socialise, used to go to everyone. But now at home and even in eve walk she wants to come in my godi. Firstly she wanted to walk on her own when we go out. But now its a big NO 🙁

Roopashree Siddireddy

Don't worry manvi. This is just a phase. Even my girl was like this. I sometimes wonder..why she dont walk. Play hide and seek..running race..show some wound and say.... Mumma is hurt and cant carry you. Dont carry yaar. I just suffered like anything...with left side hand and leg pain. Now i am recovering slowly. Play football..Do something creative.

asha chaudhry

hi manvi - this happens. believe it or not - i have heard this before and gone through some of these toddler tantrums myself. especially the susu biz. and this pattern of becoming chipkoo after an illness is a pattern every child follows. and this continues manvi. i know it's exhausting for the mother. but pls hang in there. also chk for teething. has anything else changed in the house that she wants more attention? when my FIL fell gravely ill all my childoo's milestones went for a big toss. u will need to be patient.

Priya

Hi Manvi, our moms are right. I too think it's just a phase. Having said that pls try to balance with patience and firmness. Explain to her what is right and wrong. Small things let go of. As children grow they try to assert their opinion. Stay calm mom!

Manvi Bhandari

Roopashree Siddireddy thanks dear. This behavior is since one month and godi mai rehna always is since 10 to 15 days. Yes i came to know she is trying to rule over me by crying. I m making her understand by various things. But she is not at all listening now. Nd cry cry cry out loud 🙁 this Monday we visited doc for checkup of her throat infection. Nd i mentioned doc this susu nd potty vala thing. Nd her crying thing. He told yeh sab uska ziddipana hai. Meri attention ke liye. She knows aisa karungi to aisa hoga. She is keen observer. Nd i hv to be very careful for her safety as well. As doc sees that day she was not sitting at clinic also for single min. Then i ask doc is it ok? He told she is just very active. Upto some age its fine but not after a particular age. Nd dint say anything more nd told abhi bahut choti hai. Age dekhte hai.

Shruti Giri

Every one has given you some excellent advises manvi....it's just a phase...I have gone through the same when my son was 21 months to be exact...let me tell you one thing only Patience is the key... It's very difficult even to do the regular chores sometimes but still keep calm Otherwise it becomes worse...

Roopashree Siddireddy

Dont worry at all. By reacting... you are not just spoiling your health. Even confuse your kid. I was keep showing ads , serials or anything and say... Wow how brave that girl or boy is... As they are walking. Or allowing mom to work...big clap or big hug to brave girl. Remember don't over do anything as well. Once this phase gone. Things will be fine.

Manvi Bhandari

Thank u asha chaudhry; di nd Priya Sood. Sure will try to follow these things again with more patience. Its just getting exhausted for me. Hope this phase passes well

Manvi Bhandari

asha chaudhry di, no nothing has changed in house as such.

Manvi Bhandari

Thank u so much Shruti and roopa. U guys gave me a sigh of relief. Will try my best to be more calm nd make her understand things.

Manvi Bhandari

U guys won't believe, i was under so much stress due to her sudden behaviour changes. Nd not even able to manage house chores properly. My hubby told tu BabyChakra mai kyun nhn puch rahi yeh chiz. Tu to bolti hai wahan se har solution mil jata hai. I was like kya puchu nd for the first time i realise this thing ki kya aur kaise puchu. I was like koi kaise samjhega is chiz ko bina jane. But you guys understand me so well. Nd gave good suggestions and a sigh of relief nd motivated me. Thank u so much. Lots of love to u guys.

asha chaudhry

So good to see u back Shruti Giri ! How have u been?

Aditi Ahuja

I understand your problem dear..see all kids are different..some quite, some over active etc..so her being active is actually a good sign that she is feeling well...my sisters 3 year old daughter is the same..for past 6 mnths she is unwell and doctor sometimes says tonsils and some docs say allergy..also she has become too clingy to her mother..as for behaviour and tantrums she is definitely in her terrible twos..she has started getting a sense of the world around her..is learning a lot everyday..wants to decide things..so wen a child sees ki kya karne se kya hota hai..wo use rule bana lete hai..like if she is crying and u offer chocolate instead of healthy food..they know it and next time will again do..its tricky..u cant be too strict..you cant be too lenient..easier said than done but try to strike a balance..like on wrong things your no has to be firm, dont budge or melt easily..but wen its your time with her, love her as much as you can..you can use this time to tell her about good habits, behavior, may be tell her a moral story..also ask your husband to not give up, like most men do as they are also stressed from work..if she is crying to come to you wen with him ask him to play her favourite song or rhyme on phone and dance a bit....make rituals like good night is papa ke saath story time..give her time for potty training..even my kiddo troubled me a lot in this..but l told her that each room in home has its importance, lije we dont cook in the drawing room na..devise ways..sometimes you will have to pull yoyr hair..dont worry. It happens..its a phase will pass.. Also if kiddo has lots of free time try and engage her in some activity like blocks, scribbling on paper,; colouring, clay modelling.

Manvi Bhandari

Thank u so much Aditi

Shruti Giri

Asha Chaudhary 😘 hehe...all good di...

asha chaudhry

hey manvi - on the weekend i was thinking - this behaviour could also could be related to the weaning off process.

Manvi Bhandari

asha chaudhry di, We were in process of weaning off. Went good in night for 4 days. But then she fall sick with high fever nd throat infection. Since then its again feeding nd feeding. 🙃

Manvi Bhandari

For sleep she only wants breastfeeding either its day or night 😑😢. For me the days are really gng tough nd tiresome

aradhana sharma

Excellent advice ....👏m sailing on same boat...book marked !!

asha chaudhry

manvi bhandari any progress on weaning?

Manvi Bhandari

One or two day she slept without feed. But again 3rd day back to zero 🙃 hubby gets tired after long day of offc nd not able to help me to make her sleep. With me she only wants feed for sleep 😢 else started throwing tantrums. asha chaudhry di. Btw thanks for ur concern di.

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